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Die in Sam-set fires, everyone involved.
They'll be visiting the next trip to my toaster.
Just never, ever toast them
Thanks, man, but really no big deal in the overall scheme of things. I know that sounds hellishly callous, but the fact is that he was never around, & I barely knew him.
Shirley had 2 other sons
that some people probably have, to a greater or lesser extent, an intuition to spot a person who generally shouldn't be trusted.
My grandfather had an identical twin brother; there's a family legend (my grandmother and aunt both swear they witnessed this; I'm skeptical, but hey, family legends are fun) that my grandfather was sitting in his easy chair watching TV one evening in 1984 when he suddenly jumped out of his chair and started exclaiming in pain that his left index finger suddenly hurt like it was on fire. Found out a few hours later (this part, at least, really happened) his brother had accidentally chopped half his left index finger off cutting up kindling or something with a hand axe. (The surgeons were able to reattach it.)
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